Friday

91/365

This day seems so unproductive. I have time to take a nap, sing-along, wonder about life's meanings, watch videos, listen to old songs, and dream. The hours seem longer, I am not rushing any workloads. How I miss this simple moment of life. Where I am not asking for more just simply enjoying what's on the table, appreciating ordinary things, staring at the clouds, the simplicity and authenticity of the sky make me grateful.

I am a dreamer and believe in the impossible and uncertain things. I usually dream big, knowing that I won't fulfill it on my own, I am relying on the power of HIS mighty hands. Hence, time like this makes me forget those grand and alluring dreams in my head. I just enjoy and honor this magical present moment.

But you know what, these past few days I had been worrying about tomorrow's possibilities. I am afraid that I wouldn't provide for my family's needs. I want to have more so I can provide more, given the life situation that we have. I have this burden in my heart that I should provide for all the needs of our family, particularly my grandmother and uncle. They are already growing old and I want them to see a breakthrough in our life, that there is hope in the midst of the storms.

Hence, realizations sink in. It wouldn't be easy, adulthood is really hard. I can't even figure out my life on the next page. While others are already at the peak of their success, here I am roaming, wondering, and asking questions at heaven's gate.

Maybe you're like me who's still in the season of waiting and wanting. Waiting for God's answers and wanting God's favor and provision.

I walked outside our house and I saw dogs lying on the street, smiling like human beings to me. An authentic smile that adds hope in my anxious heart. Seeing them smiling like that, enjoying the rays of the sun penetrating on their bodies and playing pebbles on the ground like a lil' children. It seems God reminds me that He knows all our needs, He provides, and He gives hope. If the dogs enjoy the day and could even smile like a person, so will I.

Tomorrow is not a promised, live in the present moment where you can enjoy the simple and ordinary things in life.

He promised that all these things will be added unto us when we seek Him first.

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6: 33-34

I stare blankly ahead on the next page, sip my coffee and utter my praises. I'm still grateful even in the unproductive, mundane, and slow days.


Published by Merrel Ya

A lady who has been pondering her hope into Christ, inhaling His grace, and enjoying the beauty of life. Writing about life, asking God about "kuliglig sa kanyang dibdib."

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